Live. Love. Chickens.

I can't pinpoint when it happened, why it happened, or even what exactly happened, but I can tell you that the last two years have been the most emotionally trying years of my life. For two years I've struggled with anxiety, depression, and intense feelings of being lost. I've tried different techniques to snap out of whatever is bringing me down from talking with a counselor, prayer, exercise, meditation, music, setting goals, etc. Some of these things would help for a while, but then the negative emotions would come screaming back and remind me that I'm not okay. Since one of the ways I help deal with my negative feelings is through goal-setting, I decided that my goal for this year was to do things. I am a very routine person; I enjoy the comfort of schedules and knowing what's to come. But I became very aware at the end of last year that I really wasn't out there having new experiences. Sure, we have moved a few times over the last 10 years, but even then...

If you know me well, or really at all, you know that I am a person that likes to feel in control. I am not controlling of others, but I like to have control of my life. I like to plan. I like organization. I like to know what is happening, when it is happening, and why it is happening. I think having that kind of personality is good and bad. Good because I get sh*t done. Bad because having that kind of mind causes lots of anxiety and unnecessary stress throughout my life. I've been having some sort of life crisis and I think a lot of it is based around the fact that I don't feel in control of my life right now. This has been a hard season these last few months. I'm not quite sure who I am outside of the roles that I fill as a wife, mother, friend, etc. I've been trying to learn more about myself and haven't been sure if I've liked that person. I look to others a lot for validation and if I don't get that, I start questioning who I am. So as someone who e